By: Robyn Busekrus
The holidays are here and they bring an assortment of emotions. The holiday songs, decorations and gifts to buy usher in the season. For myself, the holiday season starts at the end of September. Fall is in gear and Halloween is approaching.
October is the month we lost our son Hope. Fall used to be my favorite season. I still find beauty in the leaves changing colors and the weather changing.
The word I use to describe October and the holidays approaching is bittersweet.
There is sadness, yet bright spots mixed into the emotions.
When I think of holidays, I have an image of cheerfulness or happiness. Holidays are a time to celebrate and get together.
With the current times of sickness with COVID, that adds another layer to the grief and connecting to the holiday season.
The holidays are tough but the current things we are experiencing brings to surface grieving for our children and grieving for the times we are experiencing.
One way I have processed through my grief is by hanging our son’s stocking each year. I don’t take it down as it hangs in my creative space where I write. Each year I write him a letter and tuck it in the stocking. Sometimes I read them each year, while at other times I just hold onto the written words that were written. The first year I took his stocking down after the holidays was difficult. The next year, I thought the stocking could stay up and be a reminder of the gift he was to us.
Each day there are gifts. Sometimes they are hard to see and sometimes they are hard to focus on. The gift of the sun shining. The gift of trying to be an encouragement to others in difficult times.
When we have experienced difficult times, it creates an understanding of being real and knowing firsthand what it is to go through sadness and despair.
We all need gifts. Gifts of time…gifts of connecting…gifts of looking for the glimmers of light…sometimes one minute at a time and sometimes one day at a time.
During this holiday season, may we be grateful for the little things. The little things really are the big things. May we know that we are not alone, even if it feels like it. May we seek to use our gifts to support and encourage one another.
About Robyn Busekrus
Robyn Busekrus is a mom, wife, educator, and writer who makes her home in Washington, MO. Losing her third son Hope in the second trimester of pregnancy, was an unexpected part of her life’s journey.
Robyn’s blog www.robynsnestofhope.com chronicles the journey of loss and hope. Appreciating the little things in life, while holding onto faith each day is the message she wants to share with others. Her interests include reading, home decorating, vintage markets, and community service.